Ignorance – Tolerance – Vengeance – It’s a seesaw of behaviour
For adults as well as for kids
The more you are ignorant to emotions and situations – You will be tolerant
The more you have vengeance – You will be less tolerant
How do these feelings of vengeance come into us?
They come by repeated disrespect, mistrust, fakeness, lies, back biting, over hearing bitching about self , mistakes by others that trouble us and our peace of mind, endless sorrys, and an utter ignorance on part of the person whom we start to dislike. Ignorance of them feeling that we do not understand their moves. Soon our heart actually becomes sour and bitter with such repeated incidences.
Silently it gives rise to the game of manipulation.
Because you can’t bear anymore
Because you fought enough
Because you can’t keep on giving explanations and reasons
Because you can’t find your way no matter how hard you try
Because you feel neglected within the company you thought was yours
Because your presence is not acknowledged
Because to accept you by them is still in doubt
Because you gave up your priorities to be by them
And nothing is valued
It hurts you…Now!!
So..,
You move aside
Though you can never move away !!
You move to make yourself believe that now onwards you are unaffected by all the sins of others and you don’t wish to be the trash bin everyone can easily use.
This is you – An adult
What about the child?
How does a child deal with situations and be tolerant or live with acceptance?
To an extent all human beings are tolerant – They don’t just bite, pounce or retaliate on every first instance of incidence or contact.
But when a child is very young and sees situations beyond his reasoning capacity – They pounce in defence
You pull their cheeks in love – But they pull yours with pressure !!
You bite them in love – But they bite back with pressure !!
You tease them with love – But they scream back with force !!
Kids are generally misunderstood with their feelings because we don’t kneel down to see what hurts them with our words and actions.
Any incorrect behaviour by their peer or parent or sibling or caretaker is learnt as quickly as the candles blown over a birthday cake – Almost Instantly.
Children start losing out on Acceptance and Tolerance and find it difficult to follow being good!!
So should we set an example for our children to be tolerant??
I heard a yes!!!!
And then how do we keep the balance of the seesaw, cause we have to take care that it does not get flooded or over weighed with vengeance or ignorance and remains balanced with Acceptance!!
Tricky question!!
Children need Compassion, Assurance, Care, Concern, Empathy, Understanding, Warmth, Gentleness and Kindness.
Children need us to be balanced in our opinions and restrictions, values and expectations.
Be good to them. Be natural with them. Understand that every act of disrespect or anger we show will lead to the seesaw getting imbalanced. We will aggregate the feelings of acceptance and tolerance to a negative force of resentment and vengeance. We better not do so.